Tuesday how you doin!

Of course it's hot as a merry-go-round that never stops!! And lets not forget an unexpected visitor....WHAT IN THE HELL IS GO ON!!! Why do folks think they can just drop by.......this is not in my handbook for dealing with people! Because my home policy says you must call before attempting to come to my home.

I am late on my daily routine I need to eat some breakfast Oh by the even thought I haven't been walking everyday because of my eating habits I am still losing weight:-) isn't that MARVELOUS!

You know I believe the donuts was a setup because the more I think about it this person has never  brought donuts before ever, but same old thing when you make personal or physical change in your life there will always be people who feel as if it's a personal attack against them and these folks need help. But at the end of my day it won't hurt me, but maybe she did it with good intent but I trust no one and everyone always have a motive rather is good or not.
This is my feelings I think like this if I have betrayed myself and yes we all have in many ways then no one can live up to those standards nor 100 percent trust and I have no expectation of no one not even myself because we are imperfect people so for me you will never know what someone will do never.    

 demi~

Mondays I often wonder way people complain about this day but I won't do it I am happy to still be in the land of the living:-) I worked two 16 hr shifts on Saturday and Sunday now I should be in bed but I have been up cleaning and I need food in my tummy!
Well one of my coworker have been walking for like a year now and she's up to 9 miles a day plus she lost all her weight I am so happy for her talk about a blessing to reach for that goal and you make it happen! :-))))

Well as for me Olympus has Fallen!   A coworker brought in (DONUTS) yes and I had 4 I tried to fight it but I was tricked and fooled, that's right that's the story and I ain't changing a word:-)  Now the weather is perfect for walking and my body moved to clean but not to go for my walk!!!! I will make it happen tomorrow I am aiming for 4 miles praying these knees will not fail me. It's so time for breakfast....

demi~

Welcome Thursday because what was up with crazy Wednesday!

I don't understand why would my weight loss have any affect on someone's life, are some folks so unhappy within their life circle that another person personal life changes would be such a drastic change in the world they live in!!!! REALLY!

It's simple, bitter angry people just don't want to see anyone happy! it's that simple and Oh how very sad to live this way everyday of your life. To love on any level can make such a huge inside and outside change, if some folks would only allow the goodness of change:-)  Well I am so tired today I haven't did anything but eaten breakfast man I wish I was more driven but some days this fat girl says just screw it but that's today and I know tomorrow will bring a better change for me, I am just living a moment in the ups and down of a fat person's struggle.


demi~

Well back to work and thank God for a job, now I love my off days but I love back to business!!

Today I made sure to eat my breakfast I ate like 550 cals this morning not to hunger so I forced it in order not to jack up my food pattern, I have to stay on course.
Didn't sleep to well because I watched this movie on Netflix called (Listen to your Heart) and I cried so much that there was tissues everywhere plus the effect of the movie woke me up a couple of times doing the night! I had just thought it was going to be a sweet love story but, OH my goodness I felt like the world was falling apart in this movie....I really need to stop doing this to myself just so freaking emotional.

Going to do some meditation in another hour for relaxation and breathing it's really good for the body and really good for me:-) Stretching is also apart of this meditation time for me I feel so much better afterwards.
Well I have to prepare my dinner for work and a healthy smoothie for lunch plus a nap:-)

demi~

    

Happy Tuesday!!
I did a 2 mile walk this morning and boy was I in some knee pain but I did it....woo-whoooo!
But there's bad news I didn't eat breakfast like I should have and after my walk I was out and about and got hunger and had 2 honey buns:-/ well that's the cost of not staying on top so I get back up and keep going.
I think its hard to talk about our ups and downs when we want to succeed so much.....when we are working so hard to get to our goal the last thing you need is someone disapproving look saying you still trying to loss weight.
This is one of the reason I don't want to deal with someone in my life because I don't want to hear someone say anything to me about my weight, I am the only one who can fit that. And its hard to met someone who willing to go the extra mile and go walk with you or exercise, hell they want you to come package fit body ready. But not all men are that way it's just hard to run into them.

demi~

  

It's the beginning of a new week and thank you Jesus, I had my second Chiropractic appointment this morning I bit sore but better I don't go back until the end of the month.  I have increased my biotin from 5000 mcg to 10,000 mcg I feel being a over weight person it will help me get the job done. I think I needed to reevaluate my daily intake on my supplements and multivitamins because in order for this to work everything must be balanced....no balance not control then things are all out of order.
Today breakfast cal was 670 pretty close to the mark! OH boy I have good news by the end of the month the braces will be off and I can finally have all the raw foods I want to eat!!!!!! the whole time I have had these braces on it's been nothing but pain I can't wait to get them off!:-)))
Well time for a nap:-)

Demi~

Saturday, huh I am grateful.....well yesterday I went to my first chiropractic appointment and yes I am jacked up!!!! before he can do any work on me I have to use Bio-freeze for 3 days and 3 times a day to soften up the muscles and tendons last night was the first usage and my daughter sprayed it on to my lower back area and it worked like a charm.  I have been having pain in my back for the longest and with the arthritis knees I just needed to go to someone who's going to help me so I can walk better and longer to get this freaking weight off!
I start up good then get some ponds off then all hell break lose. I want to run marathons for different cause right here in my own town and I want to do it with success. I know I have gain a few pounds back but I am on the right track for permanent weight lose I know I will be back at it in no time.

Demi~

First day back to work am I'm happy its been 3 weeks of vacation and maybe I should have went to an island somewhere I am sure it would have been much peaceful!

 I didn't walk today either because even though my knees feel much better they are not ready just yet but my neighbor will start with me on the 22th so I am praying I will be good to go!! I bet I will never compromise my walk again! I went to my last walking partner home to walk in her neighborhood and the sidewalk was jack up so bad that the walk was off leveled and this is what started the pain to act up again in my Knees.

But any-who for this morning breakfast I got the calories up to 630 almost to 700 very close. Yesterday's BF filled me up big time that for lunch I ate half the sandwich my daughter made for me and for dinner one fish fillet and salad it works for me very well plus I always drink a gallon of water a day and lots of fiber because keeping the bowel flow moving is a must for me.  I deal with diverticulitis and I have had only one flare up which was my first one and I don't want to have an bad issues with this because it can cause a very bad outcome. Sometimes it take the bad things to set you straight on what you need to do:-)

Demi~

Happy Wednesday

Well it's 9:22 and its been a successful morning!!! my neighbor offered to walk in the morning with me at least 3 times a week and I thank God because it had crossed my mind to ask her but we don't know one another like that but God had showed it to me before hand:-))) I am a happy camper. Don't want to get deep in conversation is what I explain to her and we just put our earphones on and walk it! Plus I am going to buy my bike this week I think......My knees are feeling better today and back to work tomorrow! I am sure once I get back to work things will fall back to normal. I Think you would have to live like a hermit in order for life to almost be untouchable in so parts of it.

This morning I went back to 700 cal breakfast because when I eat a good healthy breakfast it works for me I have no cravings at all in the later part of the day, I did this before and then went to smoothies for breakfast and lunch but I get cravings and I can't have that I refuse to gain weight I have lost!! Let me say I am sick of that roll-coaster!!!!! weight up and down that crap has being going on for years and its my fault for not educating myself years ago and not having the self worth to change it, I had allow my past to mentally beat me up and wasn't willing to except good changes for my life. But life is so much different then it use to be for quit sometime now and thanking God for the many blessing of strength, understanding, his love for me and so much more:-))).  Well it's an hour later from the start of this blog, see I am helping my child get ready for her first job!!! yeah I am almost in tears and so happy for her she 22 and have been trying to get a job forever so her lunch is ready and she needs to leave soon to catch the bus to get there! riding the bus will keep her focused to save her money to buy a cheap car to get from point A to point B feel me.

later Dem~

Tuesday struggle!

Well for the past 2 days the arthritis in my knees are so acting up and the left knee has truly lost it so I can't really do much when this happens. This has been one crazy kinda vacation you just won't believe the weird things that has occurred and by the grace of God back to work on Thursday!!! AMEN!.....Well my walking partner has failed through once again! it started out good but people are people and oh well I did expect this to happen but that's their choice not mines, but I will never give up no matter what may arise because through Christ I can do all things and come out in victory:-))  Can't wait until it get much cooler I am an outside person I don't like to be closed up and I don't like being around strangers so the gym is getting free money but I will go back...hey don't judge me....so I won't walk early in the morning alone just not safe but once it get cooler I will be good to go in mid-day and back to work I can walk on my lunch break as always!

later Demi~

Well I feel this is a way to tell my struggle in this freaking weight loss that has been going on for half my life! No really!!! But as you get older it has it's difficult moments, I have asthma that when I get ill with it the meds put some of the weight right back on! I am just so sick and tired of it but I will not give up!!! Now in this struggle journey people always say's can I walk with you and exercise but at the end of the day they are full of bologna! these folks became a stumbling block it's about them wanting to be apart of a change but your change not their own and things can't progress in this nature so I am focusing on what I need to do and doing non-responds to the bull crap!

So today no working out it's Sunday I will be back on it tomorrow, for lunch it's baked brown sugar turkey and having it with salad:-))
 

Smiles

Demi!